Be Gentle With One Another

“Let us be very sincere in our dealings with each other,
and have the courage to accept each other as we are.
Do not be surprised or become preoccupied
at each other’s failures
– rather, see and find in each other the good,
for each one of us is created in the image of God.”

Mother Teresa has become my personal companion. I frequently think about her and how she would deal with certain challenges that I face. Her life and words are transforming me.

Bizarre Story - III

Recieved a note saying that the parole board met on Friday, Feb. 13 to make a decision regarding Bill's possible parole. Please continue to pray.

FYI - other things have happened, but I decided not to post them. Maybe later when a decision is announced.

Peace: Can you really see it?

During my weekend class we have an activity called “peer group.” Each of us takes a turn presenting ourselves in relationship to a specific directee while the others listen attentively to the Spirit on your behalf. I had presented and one of my peers stated, “I sense a deep peace about you. . .from the moment I saw you this evening, I noted how peaceful you seemed.”

My friend’s words were almost identifical to what my spiritual director had said to me three weeks ago. These women don’t know each other and live at least 1oo miles apart.

So even though I may feel like things are uncontrollable and chaotic, even though each step is painful and things don’t make sense . . .I have a sense of peace. I have no other explanation except it is God. I know that Spirit is inviting me even deeper into God’s peace and His rest.

Where the Air is Thin

There is no short cut,

no patent tram-road,

to wisdom.

After all the centuries of invention,

the soul's path lies

through the thorny wilderness

which must be still trodden in solitude,

with bleeding feet,

with sobs for help,

as it was trodden by them of old time.

- George Eliot

My Prayer

My prayer. . .
That I will consistently place my husband and children above all other things, loving in the home first and then the community beyond.
That I will journey well with my elderly parents in their final days on this earth and have no regrets.
That I will be a “pencil” in the hand of God.
That I will always be teachable.
That I will enjoy ALL that has been gifted to me, but also hold it loosely.
That I will become a restful and peaceful woman.

Where the Air is Thin

For years I’ve been intrigued with the summit expeditions to Mt. Everest. So intrigued that I skipped my last birthing class to hear Dave Bereshears talk about his IMAX Everest filming in 1996 when Aussie Rob Hall died along with 7 or so other people.

As I watch these Mt. Everest films I am amazed at the single-mindedness of the successful climbers, like Ed Vesters and Norgay. In the dead zone, each step is one of agony, each step, each breathe is literally killing them as they draw nearer to the summit. Some people survive the extreme high altitudes of Everest without bottled oxygen, their bodies becoming acclimatized to the dangerously low levels of oxygen.

Lately I’m finding my spiritual trail feels like I’m in the dead zone. Each step is a conscious choice. Nothing feels at all natural, easy or comfortable. Sometimes I want to put my head in the sand and hide, but instead I go to bed crazy early like 7:30p and get up to embrace another day. “I’m thankful for another day of life,” like my friend Kris still says after 9 years of fighting cancer. (She is a hero)

Maybe like the climbers, Ed Vesters and Norgay, I will become acclimatized to living my spiritual life where the oxygen is thin. Maybe I will begin to function at a different realm of dying to myself and all that it entails. Maybe I will come to recognize that my “crazy” days are simply the norm. Maybe Spirit’s presence will become more evident as the air thins, and as I die and live in a new higher dimension of life.

I don’t know.

As long as the trail draws me closer to God, I'm climbing.

FYI - Late April and May is when people climb Everest.

Good things

The other day when I drove into Allie’s school my heart filled with anticipation because Linda’s car was in the parking lot. While attending weekend class at Siena Heights, Linda is getting in her required classroom hours at a Montessori school. I’ve only known Linda since September yet immediately felt a kinship with her. I can’t remember what our five minute conversation consisted of that morning. I just know that I walked away blessed and at peace.

I think that is how people must have felt when they encountered Jesus, or met Mother Teresa, or my good friend Randy Shafer. What grace I have received to have these real life, Jesus-people, touching and blessing me.

Spirit, help me to become like them, like You. amen.

I met with my spiritual director the other week. After I shared about the life’s events, how I saw God moving in them, and decisions that I needed to make, we sat quietly a few minutes. Then she looked at me and said, “I sense a deep peace within you.”

I almost burst out laughing hysterically! But out of deep respect and love for this woman, I held back!

On my drive back to Jackson I reflected on our session. I truly believe that God’s Spirit speaks to me through my spiritual director. So it was not Sherie, my spiritual director, who said I had peace, it was God! As I drove I began to be conscious of His peace, I began to rest in His peace, and I began to live the peace spoken to me. WORDS are powerful! My spiritual director spoke words of promise and future into my life.

Since our meeting I have frequently went back to cling to her words, the Spirit’s words for my life. I am at peace. I will live in peace rather than chaos. I choose to be peaceful and bring peace into my daily circumstances (with God’s grace).

I wonder how I would be living out my days, if my spiritual director had said, “You seem really stressed out!” Knowing myself, I imagine that I would be living in that statement.

Let God use you to bless someone. Speak words of truth, promise and hope into corners of darkness.
Let God use you to bless someone. Mother Teresa says a simple smile can change a person.

Bizarre Story - II

This has been a very odd and trying week. The most surreal events occured on Wednesday as I sat in a public hearing for a convicted murderer. Bill, a 61 year old man, seeking to be paroled after 43 years in prison. This is the first time I've ever physically seen the man. He was brought in with chains and sat with his back to us - friends and foes - as two state officials "interviewed" him.

They grilled the prisoner for 3.5 hours, asking for details and explanations of his choices and actions that occurred in 1965, while he was under the influence of drugs and alcohol. Twelve years ago, someone broke into my apartment and attacked me. I wasn’t drinking or on drugs and I CAN’T recall specific details of that night! How do they expect someone to recall events and details from 43.5 years ago?

Emotion of the Day included:
anger at Bill; at the state officials; awe at how submissive this man was after 43 years of prison; awareness of the sutlbe ways Bill was controlled; deep sadness at the horrible pain this crime has resulted in for the grandma and her family, for Bill, for my parents; surprise and pain for the brokenness and anger the victim's family still live in.

Surprises of the Day included:
There was no mention of how God has changed Bill’s life. There were also very few comments about the drugs and alcohol, Bill used back then. I can only imagine that he was coached to not talk about these things.


Highlights of the day included:
My brother spoke words of healing in that public hearing. I sensed an openness from the state officials. I could breathe easier hearing words acknowledging all of our brokenness.

My Dad. My dad has an 8th grade education and probably has a third grade reading level at best. As a kid my dad had a cleft palette that wasn’t fixed, so he has a speech impediment. My 81 year old dad, walks to the witness stand. Dad states he has known Bill since he was 12 years old when the kid played on his softball team. Dad says that he has stuck by Bill for all these years, because Dad could relate to his story. Dad drank and frequently blacked out not recalling events he had participated in. Dad is my hero. (He visits a HS classmate of mine who is also in prison). Dad is my hero!

Finally Bill. After the attorney general states he would not recommend parole (he doesn’t make the decision, a panel of 10 people will meet to make a decision), Bill thanks both state official for the opportunity to have a public hearing. He once again accepts the responsibility and consequences of his actions of October 1965 and he expresses his deep regret for his actions. But then he says, “even if this public hearing does not turn out like I would hope and I am not released from prison, I will continue to grow, learn and help others wherever I am at.” WOW!

Please pray that 6 of the 10 parole board give him a chance to live outside the prison system.

WWKids - Gleaners Food Bank

Did you know that one in eight Michigan families will need emergency food assistance this year? That means Westwinds probably has about 100 families that will need help. Maybe it is someone who sat next to you at Fusion, or maybe you are that person.

Gleaners Community Food Bank, located in Detroit distributes food for 392,000 meals every week to more than 430 partner agencies in six southeastern Michigan counties. On Saturday, January 31, over 30 WWKids and families traveled to participate in Gleaners’ Kids Helping Kids program. We put together 180 snack bags filled with “kid approved” food. These bags will find their way into local school systems, providing snacks to a whole lot of hungry kids.

At Westwinds our kids know that following Jesus is not just about an hour on Sunday mornings. They are learning that following Jesus is about loving and serving their neighbor, and that looks like playing games with the elderly at Ganton Care Center, cleaning toys for the Priceless Toy Store, making blankets for grandmas and helping pack snack bags for a classroom of kids!

We have AWESOME kids at Westwinds!

For more info about Gleaners check out www.gcfb.org

The Spirit can influence and guide us only to the extent we are in touch with our inner self.

I was talking with a friend who desired a deeper relationship with Jesus. As we talked about her prayer life, she mentioned that she “throws up a quick prayer in the car before walking into work.” I sensed some sarcasm in her flippant response so I affirmed that “quick car prayers” worked for God. I wanted to reassure my friend that God doesn’t “cancel out” a prayer due to where it took place. Prayer is so much more than what I used to think it was. I pray in the car every day taking the kids to school and going to work. In fact my prayer seems to permeate the day.

This conversation with my friend prompted me to go back to Richard Hauser’s handout from the first year and to define the “Holy Spirit’s daily action” in my life. Hauser says that to get a better sense of the presence of the Spirit in your life, it is helpful to go through the regular activities of your day to see which ones are performed with a desire to love and serve God and which are not. You do this for two reasons. First, you want to recognize the Spirit’s presence in your daily life so that you can praise God for the Spirit’s work and second, you want to become aware of those activities where the Spirit is habitually absent in order to turn them over to the Lord and have them transformed.

Hauser suggests that as you move throughout your day you become aware and note the Spirit’s movements. What did you observe, what patterns or themes have surfaced, where and when does the Spirit move? What is the rhythm of your day?

I was surprised to discover that my prayer life had really evolved. It moved from a morning prayer time toward a continuous prayer throughout the day. Maybe this is what Paul meant when he said in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (King James Version) 16 Rejoice evermore. 17 Pray without ceasing. 18 In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. Your life becomes one continuous act of prayer, like Mother Teresa.

The daily rhythm of my life is described in the following outline.
Pre-alarm (4:15-4:45) -– sometimes cuddling in bed for a few extra minutes, dozing, praying. The Spirit sometimes speaks to me in this semi-awake zone. Typically, I pray for my husband during this time.
Dog time (4:30-4:45) – take the dog outside. I have experienced beautiful, awesome times of wonder outside with the dog. There is a deep silence and peace.
Early morning (5-6:00) – silent time, listening to God – for me this also includes journaling, reading and studying.
Morning car time alone or with kids (7:30-8:15) – thanksgiving game, “what I’m thankful for” or “what I’m looking forward to today” or “what do we need to pray about today”
Throughout the day – intercessory – lifting up people in prayer
Afternoon car time with kids – how was your day? What was the best part of your day? What drew you towards God or what made you think of God today?
Dinner time with kids - “what I’m thankful for,” praying for safe trip home for dad, praying for Mr. Randy's family, Miss Kris and Lois, all friends who are struggling with cancer.
Bedtime (or naptime) Examen – reflection on the day. What drew me to God and what drew me away from God?

This deeper awareness of my daily rhythm helps me identify changes that I may need to make to enable me “to move through my day energetically, peacefully and lovingly in order that I may keep Christ’s command to love and serve with my whole heart, soul, mind, and body.”

Hauser says three areas must be considered. First, what adjustments should I make in my lifestyle in order to respond energetically to the Spirit and serve God with my “whole body?” Basically, how do I take care of my body; eating, resting and exercising? Second, should adjustments be made in order to live with more inner peace and so better serve God with my “whole mind”? How is my mental health? The Spirit can influence and guide us only to the extent we are in touch with our inner self. Finally, I must build time into my daily schedule to be explicitly with the Lord and allow the Spirit’s presence to well up in my consciousness. This requires a regular rhythm of solitude, personal prayer, Mass and reflection on my own actions

Richard Hauser, Moving in the Spirit: Becoming a Contemplative in Action, Paulist, Press, Mahwah, NJ. 1986, page 34.

A bizarre story

I grew up with a bizarre story surrounding a man named Bill Sleeper. This is the story as I heard it and then told to others:

When I was about 3 years old, my dad was coaching a kids softball team at church. One day, a 17-year-old kid from his team, got high on drugs and alcohol and murdered his neighbor lady by stabbing her to death with scissors. This kid’s name was Bill Sleeper. He sentenced to prison on July 27, 1967, for murder in the second degree, for a life term. It was my sister’s 9th birthday and I was 4 years old that summer.

Bill Sleeper’s story has always been part of my life. I was probably about 13 or 14 when the story began to take a new reality for me. I remember when our small youth group, bought Christmas gifts and delivered them to Bill’s wife and daughter (don’t ask! That’s an entire another part of the story that I’m not even going to try to tell). Bill was at the state prison in Jackson, Michigan and his family lived near by. I remember going shopping, wrapping gifts and dropping them off at his wife Carole and her daughter Tina's house.

Over the years Mom would write letters to Bill and together my parents would visit him in prison. They traveled to various prisons throughout Michigan, as Bill was moved from place to place. On special occasions like Mom and Dad’s birthday, I began to see hand drawn cards that Bill had made and sent to them. For a brief period of time, my parents welcomed Bill’s wife into their home to live with them.

One day I saw a picture of Mom and Dad with some big 6’3”, 300 lb. guy and asked mom who was that in the photo. It was Bill Sleeper! In last 10-15 years my family and I began to receive birthday cards from Bill and on several occasions I’ve talked to Bill when he's called my parents on special days like Christmas, their 50th wedding anniversary, or Mom or Dad's 80th birthday celebration.

It is rather surreal to talk to this man, who has been such a part of my life, but not. A man who considers and loves my parents like they were his own! I feel like I have a mysterious big brother who is a part of our family, yet I really don’t know.

My 81-year-old dad has said that there were 3 things he was living for:
to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary; (Sept.14, 2007)
to see his oldest granddaughter Chelsea graduate from high school; (June 2008)
and to see Bill Sleeper released from prison.

On Wednesday, February 4 at 9am, I will meet Bill Sleeper here in Jackson at a parole board hearing. My sister, brother and I will join my parents to stand in support of Bill’s release from prison after 42 years.

I don’t know how to prepare for this day. It seems very surreal. Whatever happens I know that my parents are heros! To love and support Bill when even his family has not. It will be an interesting day.